Sunday, May 31, 2009

My Love - A Poem About One's First Love

There are three main reasons why someone comes to Christ and receives Him as Lord and Savior of their lives and drives men and women to their knees before Him.

One reason is through a realization of the holiness of God and the unholiness, wretchedness of man and the complete realization that God is everything and you are nothing. Second reason is brought about with a very real and overwhelming fear of God's wrath and the final expression of His wrath being hell. Plus, the reality of what we really deserve from God is to spend the rest of eternity separated from Him in hell. Third reason comes about by falling head over heels in love with the loving Savior, Jesus Christ.

To fully realize how much Jesus Christ loves you and how much you mean to Him. My reason for first accepting Jesus Christ into my heart and life was reason number three. No one introduced me to Him, He just revealed Himself to me in a personnel, intimate way that I will never forget. At the start of my freshmen year in high school, all of my childhood friends moved away and I was left alone. In addition, I did not feel a lot of love at home from my parents and my one younger brother. I entered high school alone, feeling unwanted, unloved and consequently became depressed.

Looking back at my freshmen year, I would say the hardest part of being and feeling alone was not actually being alone or feeling disconnected from people but instead feeling that I wasn't valuable enough, for anyone to want to get to know me.

I always knew about God but I did not know Him; there is a tremendous difference between the two. Growing up, my parents would often take my brother and me to church. And during elementary school I would go to Bible class which was held once a week in a trailer and lasted about an hour. Church and Bible class is where I learned about God and some of the stories in the Bible. However, as far as I can remember, no one really taught me how to know God personally and intimately. Having no one to talk to during my freshmen year, I decided to take on the endeavor of getting knowing God by talking to Him.

My getting to know God started in conversations with Him, actually, I'm the one that did all of the talking so I guess it wasn't much of a two way conversation. Many times these conversations took place in an oak tree. However, whenever I talked to God I would request one desire, which was for God to take my life literally. Looking back, I realize that I wasn't getting to know God and certainly had no real clue to who He was. For God is the God of life and not death. And when one realizes God's love for them and embraces that love then one cannot help but to live life to the fullest. Jesus said, "..I have come that they may have life and life to the full." (John 10:10).

God is a rewarder of those who seek Him, no matter how one starts the seeking process. A couple of months into my freshmen year of high school, God sent me a friend and someone that He can talk through. His name was Ken Caster and he was a junior at my school. I met Ken while I was sitting alone at the lunch table in the cafeteria. As I was eating Ken approached me and sat down. He then did something that no one else had ever done, he asked me my name.

Ken did not immediately start preaching to me about Jesus. Really he didn't talk at me, spilling out theological and evangelical useful information. Instead, he simply started asking questions about me, he started to get to know me. I did not know it the time but it was at that moment I was talking face to face with God; for by just seeking to get to know me, Ken was displaying the character and heart of Jesus. For in every believer God lives and when we walk in obedience in accordance with God's holiness and His love then Jesus, who is also God (John 1:1-3,14), is manifested through the life of the Christian.

After several weeks from the first meeting with Ken I started going to Campus Life, there I met more of Ken's friends who quickly became my friends. Campus Life was a ministry which met once every other week. During the meetings there would be an icebreaker, then an open discussion about contemporary issues and how they relate to the Christian life. At the end of every discussion, a leader or someone would wrap up the discussion and the meeting would close with a social time. Someone working with Campus Crusade for Christ were in charge of these meetings. I am sure that during these meetings, Ken or someone told me about Jesus but I don't remeber anyone telling me the Gospel or salvation.

Towards the end of March of my freshmen year, Ken invited me to see a Christian comedian named, Ken Davis in concert. It sounded fun so I agreed. In April Ken and some of his friends picked me up and took me to the concert. During the show I could not remember the last time, if any, I laughed and not only laughed but laughed so hard, that at times it was hard for me to breath. Towards the end, when the laughing stopped, Ken Davis proceeded to tell us about the Gospel of Jesus Christ. This was the first time when I heard about the Man, the God and the Savior that I would fall in love with.

At the end of his message Ken Davis asked everyone to bow their heads and not to think about anything. He asked, while heads bowed, to let the Holy Spirit move and allow God to talk to our hearts.

This night was the first night when God spoke and I listened. While my head was bowed God did speak to me, not with words but with His love and I began to feel and sense Jesus Christ's presence, His loving presence, all around me and inside of me, and for the first time in my life I did not feel alone. Then Ken Davis asked if anyone wanted to accept Jesus into their heart and if so to come up front.

Without thinking, I slowly stood up with my head still bowed and I slowly made my way up to the stage. As I was making my way up I began to lift my head and shame started sliding off me like butter and acceptance started to clothe me.

While I was walking down the aisle and up towards the stage, I did not look to the right or to the left but looked straight ahead then up towards the heavens, it was like I was looking straight into the loving eyes of the Savior.

For it was that night I saw the face of my love but it wasn't my fleshly eyes that beheld Him but my spiritual eyes that beheld Jesus Christ, my love. It was that night I knew I would never again be alone. After much rejoicing with Ken Caster and his friends I went home and headed up stairs to my bedroom.

In my bedroom alone but yet not alone I made a vow I said, "Jesus, I want to live for you no matter what. If it is cool or uncool, if it is the right thing to do or the wrong thing to do, I will live for you. Since then I started conversing with God and now I try to do the majority of the listening. When God speaks to me, many time I hear his words and feel His arms around me and His love warming my heart and spirit on cold, dark nights.

It was on one of those nights that I wrote my first poem called "My Love." Other poems would follow mainly about Jesus, which comes from my new heart that I received the night when I accepted Jesus Christ into my heart and life, at a Christian comedian concert in April of my freshmen year of high school.

My Love

I remember when I first fell in love,
your gentles like a dove,
your voice calling me
to be your love.

I remember when I first held your hand,
as I promised to cherish you
in this foreign land.

When times come when I feel lost and scared,
I hear your voice saying,
"You have nothing to fear,
remember you are mine,
All of this because I care."

For I know, I am the apple of your eye,
before you I was nothing but now I am something,
by the result of your love that will never die.

There was a time, long ago
when you proved your love for me,
and showed me once and for all,
You will never let me go.

For my sins you died upon a tree,
with powerful action,
on the cross,
you displayed your love for me.

When I heard you had died, I started to cry,
but tears of sadness turned to tears of joy,
when you arose and appeared by my side.

Soon you told me you had to leave,
to prepare a place for me,
where we will be together for eternity.

My love, there are still times when I feel discouraged,
when I grow suddenly afraid and loose all courage,
tough still I am quick to rejoice,
for you have promised me,
you will come back for me,
and with your sweet voice,
call me by name to join you in eternity.

Jeff Dalton
317-902-2266
http://www.gracereminders.com
Reminding people of God's grace with one word at a time.

Nothing Will Be Impossible

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